Your mother told you that she named you in her Will as Executor of her estate. She trusts your judgment on financial and family matters. Now your mother has died and you ask, "Why me? I have never been an Executor before." Where do you begin? As Connecticut estate planning and probate lawyers, we prepared a handy list of what to do in the first week after someone dies.
1. Handle the care of any dependents and/or pets
This first responsibility may be the most important one. Usually, the person who died (“the decedent”) made some arrangement for the care of a dependent spouse or children. You or others may need to take them home temporarily if they cannot continue living in the decedent’s home. Decedents frequently overlook the care of pets upon their death. Go to the house as soon as possible to check their condition. Find a good home for them even if it is temporary. The Estate can pay expenses related to dependents and pets so keep good records of all expenditures for them.
2. Monitor the home
Keep an eye on the decedent’s home, answer phone messages, collect mail, discard food, and water plants. If you do not live near the decedent’s home, ask a friend or relative to handle this task. If necessary, change the locks. Don’t give away any personal property in this first week. Keep current all essential utilities like heat and electricity. Save all receipts and create a spreadsheet with all expenses to be reimbursed.
3. Notify close family and friends
Ask someone to contact others to tell them of the decedent’s passing. Find the decedent’s address book and look for their e-mail contacts. Send cards to those who do not use e-mail regularly.
4. Arrange for funeral and burial or cremation
Search the decedent’s papers to determine whether they have a prepaid funeral contract or burial plan. Ask a friend or family member to go with you to the mortuary. Decide how you will pay for the funeral and memorial service. Unless the decedent made you the joint owner of a bank account, you and close family will need to front these costs and get reimbursed from the estate. With respect to burial instructions, the Will is not controlling. Look for a document entitled Disposition of Remains which is on our web site. This document expresses a decedent’s wishes regarding what is to be done with their body.
5. Prepare the funeral service
In some religious faiths, the funeral service occurs soon after death. Find any directions from the decedent in this regard. Our Personal Affairs and Funeral Arrangements Checklist, or a similar document, should provide you with this information. If there are no such directions, gather close family members and create an outline of the service. Visit with the clergy member to review the service. Prepare remembrances and gather photos for the wake and the funeral reception. Contact the restaurant or other venue at which you want to hold the reception. If appropriate, a eulogy for a funeral or memorial service may also be warranted. Feel free to delegate this task if you know others who could handle this delicate assignment as well or better than you.
6. Prepare an obituary
It will mean a lot to the family if you take the time to prepare an obituary well. Send the obituary to the local newspaper. If the decedent retired to another city and state, send the obituary to the newspaper there as well.
7. Order Death Certificates
Get at least 10 original death certificates. The funeral home will usually order these certificates for you. Executors need original death certificates to apply for admission of the Will in Probate Court, change the ownership of joint accounts, and obtain date of death values of investments for preparing the estate tax return.
8. Find Important Documents
Those documents include the Will, any Trust Agreement, the latest bank account statements, investment statements, deeds, birth certificate, marriage certificate, divorce decree (if any), Social Security information, life insurance policies, certificates of title to vehicles and keys to the safe deposit box or home safe.
9. Get a Court Decree Appointing You as Executor
Hire a Connecticut probate lawyer or law firm that focuses their practice in the area of trusts & estates. Ask for a copy of the law firm’s probate information form so you know what information they will request to probate the estate. See our Estate Settlement Data Sheet as a sample. Get waivers of notice and hearing from each heir of the decedent. See the attached General Waiver for this probate court form. Heirs include a spouse and all children. Use e-mail to get waivers especially if the decedent had many children living in different states. Have your lawyer prepare the Application for Probate and file the Application and waivers with the Probate Court in which the decedent resides.
10. Call the Employer
Call the decedent’s last employer if he or she was working or received pension or health insurance benefits from the employer. Request information about the amount of benefits, the successor beneficiary of those benefits, and any pay due. Ask whether there was a life insurance policy through the employer. If the company provides life insurance, ask for an IRS Form 712 and the beneficiaries of the policy.
