Do you remember the first time one of your parents let you drive the family car? Remember the excitement you felt getting behind the steering wheel, followed quickly by that rush of anxiety as you realized you were accelerating down the road, and the trees appeared to jump out toward the car? Remember the sound of the engine roaring from you pressing too hard on the accelerator, turning quickly into the sound of a neck jolting screech as you attempted to apply the brakes for the first time? During my first lesson, my Dad's quick corrections on the wheel saved several unsuspecting joggers. Fortunately for my Dad, he had a strong neck, and a lot of patience, as I gradually improved with each lesson.
Over time, our anxieties as new drivers ease, and driving becomes second nature, as we enjoy the new found liberation of being able to come and go as we please.
Driving a car becomes an expectation and a “right” as we age. Losing that freedom can be difficult for a person to accept.
Unfortunately, our ability to drive may decline due to the effects of aging on our vision, hearing, reaction time, and memory. So, what should you do if Mom or Dad begins to have difficulty driving safely?
Driving Solutions
First, driving is not necessarily an all-or-nothing activity. Some programs exist to help elderly drivers adjust their driving to changes in their physical condition.
AARP (the American Association of Retired Persons) sponsors a Driver Safety Program, designed especially for drivers age 50 and older, which helps people deal with issues such as:
- How to minimize the effects of dangerous blind spots
- How to maintain the proper following distance behind another car
- The safest ways to change lanes and make turns at busy intersections
- Proper use of safety belts, air bags, antilock brakes and new technology found in cars today
- Ways to monitor your own and others' driving skills and capabilities
- The effects of medications on driving
- The importance of eliminating distractions, such as eating, smoking and using a cellphone
- How to compensate for vision problems associated with aging
These Driver Safety Programs are taught at numerous senior centers and other convenient locations throughout the United States, including Connecticut. Visit www.aarpdriversafety.org or call (877) 846-3299 for locations and dates. Upon completion of the program, participants may be eligible for insurance discounts.
Additionally, the Association for Driver Rehabilitation offers referrals to specialists who teach people with disabilities, including those associated with aging, how to improve their driving. Visit www.driver-ed.org or call (866) 672-9466 for more information.
There are many ways for elderly drivers to adjust so they are not a danger to themselves or others. Among them are:
- Avoid driving at night, dawn or dusk
- Drive only to familiar locations
- Avoid driving to places far away from home
- Avoid expressways (freeways)
- Avoid rush hour traffic
- Allow plenty of time to get to their destination
- Don’t drive alone
Other forms of transportation
Encourage your loved one to rely more on public transportation. This will reduce their time behind the wheel and help prepare them for the day when they can no longer drive. Many cities offer special discounts for seniors on buses and trains. Most town senior centers often provide special transportation for seniors. Community service agencies also provide transportation. For example, the Eastern Connecticut Transportation Consortium (ECTC) www.ectcinc.com (860-859-5791) provides free rides for seniors 60 years of age or older who reside in Bozrah and Franklin for medical appointments, shopping and other needs. Their Resources page list links to other websites for both transportation and social service organizations serving Eastern Connecticut .
How to know when it is time to stop driving
The Connecticut DMV (Department of Motor Vehicles) has a Center for Experienced Drivers with a website containing valuable information for older drivers www.ct.gov/experienced. According to the website, some signs of diminished capacity for driving safely include:
- Having a series of minor accidents or near crashes
- Having wandering thoughts or being unable to concentrate
- Being unable to read ordinary road signs
- Getting lost on familiar roads
- Having other drivers honk at you frequently
- Being spoken to about your driving by police, family, and friends
How to get them to stop
If your loved one is truly an unsafe driver, it is important for their own safety and the safety of others that you get them to stop driving. If you are lucky, they will agree without an argument. If not, you have several options:
- Stage an intervention. Family members, health care workers and anyone else respected by the senior, as a group, confront the elderly driver. Conduct the intervention firmly but with compassion in order to break through the senior’s denial of the issue.
- Contact the Department of Motor Vehicles and report your concerns. The DMV may do nothing more than send a letter, but this might help convince your parent or loved one to stop.
- Disable the car. Take the keys or move the car to a location beyond the elderly person’s control. Leave the headlights on all night or disconnect the battery to disable the car. But, if your loved one is likely to call AAA or a mechanic, you have no choice but to eliminate all access to the car. While this may seem extreme, it might save the life of your loved one, another driver or a pedestrian.
Our parents led us into the world of driving. We owe it to them to guide them through their driving challenges as they age.
